10 Weird Mannerisms of People Abused By Narcissists -

Have you ever noticed those odd habits some people exhibit after being abused by narcissists? Let’s peek into the lives of these narcissistic abuse victims. Abuse leaves marks on the surface and in their daily routines. At first, these habits might seem strange, but they have underlying stories behind them.

Here are 10 weird habits you might spot in these individuals.

#1: Narcissistic abuse victims second-guess what other people say.

When someone has been through narcissistic abuse, they often have a hard time trusting what people say. For example, if their partner says something kind, they might think, “Do they really mean that, or are they trying to fool me?” This happens because they were often lied to, criticized, or controlled in the past. Experts say this is a way their mind tries to protect them from being hurt again. People who’ve experienced this kind of abuse become very sensitive to anything that might be manipulation, so they question even simple comments. This makes it tough for them to trust others without feeling suspicious.

People who have been through narcissistic abuse often hide their real feelings when they’re around others. It’s like they wear a mask or keep a straight face so no one can tell what they’re really feeling inside. This happens because they’ve been emotionally hurt and criticized a lot by the narcissist, so they feel the need to protect themselves. They don’t want to look weak or let anyone see what they’re going through. Experts say this is a way to stay safe emotionally. Over time, they learn to keep their emotions hidden so they don’t get hurt again.

#3: Narcissistic abuse victims overclean their surroundings.

People who’ve been through narcissistic abuse might develop this habit of overcleaning as a coping mechanism. When someone deals with a narcissist’s constant criticism and need for control, they might feel a lack of control in their lives, so cleaning becomes a way to manage that chaos. Imagine someone who’s been in a relationship with a narcissist; they might have faced daily criticism or felt like walking on eggshells. So to regain a sense of order, they clean excessively. It’s like finding peace in a chaotic world, even if it means scrubbing the kitchen for hours or organizing things meticulously. This behavior might not just be about cleanliness but about regaining a sense of control that was lost during the abusive relationship.

#4: Narcissistic abuse victims always double-check locked doors at home.

When someone goes through narcissistic abuse, they might develop this habit of double-checking locked doors at home. It’s like a security blanket for them. It’s not just about ensuring the door is closed; it’s about feeling safe and in control. Psychologists say that this behavior often stems from the trauma of feeling invaded or unsafe during the abuse. This habit might give them a sense of reassurance or a feeling of regaining control after feeling powerless. It’s like a mental strategy to ease their anxiety or fear, almost like a little ritual they perform to calm their mind. Experts often work with these individuals to help them find healthier ways to feel secure without relying solely on checking locks.

#5: Narcissistic abuse victims prefer to eat or travel alone.

When someone has gone through narcissistic abuse, they might enjoy doing things alone, like eating out or traveling. It helps them feel in control again and brings them peace. Experts say that after being in a relationship with someone who was always controlling, people often need alone time to feel independent again.

For example, if your partner used to criticize everything you did—like where you wanted to eat or how you planned a trip—you might feel more relaxed doing those things on your own now. Being alone lets you make your own choices without fear of judgment. Experts believe this helps people figure out what they really like and take back their freedom, like starting fresh.

When narcissistic abuse victims share their stories, it’s like hitting a mental roadblock. Imagine trying to tell a story, but the words don’t flow right. Words get stuck, and you stutter or stumble through the sentences. Experts reckon this stuttering might be the brain’s way of handling the tough stuff. It’s like a defense mechanism trying to slow things down, sort through the emotions, and protect us from feeling overwhelmed. Psychologists think the mind attempts to cope with all the hurt and confusion tangled up in those experiences.

#7: Narcissistic abuse victims say “I’m sorry” all the time.

People who have been through narcissistic abuse often say sorry too much, even for small things. It’s like a habit they picked up from always being blamed in the past. For example, someone might step on their foot, but they’re the one who says sorry. Being constantly criticized can mess with how they see responsibility. They end up feeling nervous all the time, afraid of getting in trouble—even for small mistakes at work. Experts say this happens because the constant blame sticks with them and makes them feel like everything is their fault.

Therapy and support can help them break this habit and learn they don’t have to keep saying sorry for things that aren’t their fault. It’s important for them to understand they don’t have to carry that guilt anymore.

#8: Narcissistic abuse victims avoid eye contact during conversations.

People who’ve been through narcissistic abuse might avoid making eye contact during conversations. Imagine every time you spoke up, someone made fun of you or criticized you—after a while, it would make you nervous to look people in the eye when talking.

Psychologists say this happens because being constantly put down can make eye contact feel scary. It’s like your brain thinks looking someone in the eye might lead to more hurt. So, avoiding eye contact becomes a way to protect yourself. Even after the abuse is over, this habit can stick around as a defense, helping you feel safer during conversations.

#9: Narcissistic abuse victims hyperventilate when proving a point.

Proving a point can be a stress trigger for people who’ve dealt with narcissistic abuse. Suppose you’re at work presenting an idea in front of everybody; suddenly, you’re all jittery and can’t catch your breath. Your body has gone into overdrive to back up your words. Psychologists say this hyperventilating often comes from how their abusers constantly dismissed them before. Imagine feeling like what you said never mattered for ages. It messes with your confidence, right? So when they’re trying to make a point, the anxiety hits hard. They’re fighting to be understood, dealing with all that history in the middle of a discussion.

#10: Narcissistic abuse victims brush off compliments.

Narcissistic abuse can make taking compliments feel like navigating a tricky maze. Dr. Romani Durvasula, a clinical psychologist, puts it this way: narcissistic abuse can leave victims feeling like they’re wearing a t-shirt that says, “Don’t compliment me; I’m not good enough.” So when someone says, “You look great today,” or “You did a fantastic job,” they might respond with a quick, “Oh, this old thing,” or “It was nothing.” They avoid basking in the positivity. Their mind has this shield that protects them from feeling vulnerable or exposed by the compliments. Psychologists explain that victims of narcissistic abuse often internalize the belief that they’re not worthy of praise.

Understanding the weird habits of those abused by narcissists sheds light on the lasting impact of such relationships. From excessive apologizing to seeking constant validation, these habits often stem from a history of manipulation and emotional trauma. Recognizing these behaviors can be a step toward healing and reclaiming one’s sense of self. If you identify with these habits, seeking help and surrounding yourself with a supportive community can make a big difference in your recovery journey.

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